New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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