Nicole vs. Life
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
The Olympian is in my bed
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
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