i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize