somebody snuck up and got me drunk
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Terrible idea I love it
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize