i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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