You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize