Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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