I'm so fucking centered right now
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
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