I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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