Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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