I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize