i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
There are leaves in my underwear?
The air taste purple.
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