do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's gonorrhea incarnate
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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