i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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