my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
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