I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
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he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
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Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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