Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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