I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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