I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
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I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize