Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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