I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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