For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
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