dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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