She said her name was "party"
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
So squirting runs in the family.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Just pee around me
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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