So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
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