my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize