love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
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I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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