from now on my penis is your penis
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
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