96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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