I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whose ass print is on the piano?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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