Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize