It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize