Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize