I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
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