um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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