CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I pour the whiskey from now on
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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