Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
