I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize