A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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