we made out on top of his cat.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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