The maid of honor just puked.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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