We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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