I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize