i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
my nose is crying tears of wow.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize