Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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