your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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