One girl and one boy is just not enough.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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