I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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