I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
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We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
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Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I did not marry a roomba.
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