P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
My balls are so social today.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize